Dead Pool 2 - Entries Now Please
Okay after careful consideration, and much reasoned thought. The Dead Pool World Governing Body has declared the 2006 Dead Pool Season officially on.
Posted below are the rules, please note the entry fee and the deadline. Money to me or Bert Archer please.
The Rules of Dead Pool
Rule No. 1: Never talk about Dead Pool (it makes people antsy – also jealous)
Rule No. 2: Killing is wrong; it says so in the Pentateuch. So no cheating. (Except as provided by Rule No. 9 – but no peaking; Rule No. Two-and-a-Half is “Read the rules in order.”)
Rule No. 3: Not all of those about to die are equal. In fact, their lives, and the deaths which make those lives worthwhile in retrospect, have precise values, which follow:
• If you are 75 or over, you are worth 2
• If you are between 50 and 74, you are worth 5
• If you are 25-49, you are worth 10
• If you are under 25, you are worth 25.
Rule No. 4: You must pay $20. The money will be invested wisely, with interest/loss devolving to the winner.
Rule No. 5: You must pay $20. The money will be invested wisely, with interest/loss devolving to the winner.
Rule No. Five-and-a-Half: Anyone who dies before midnight on Jan. 6 is ineligible for Dead Pool. Sorry, Irving Layton, whose poetry I didn’t really like.
Rule No. 6: You may pick 10 famous people. One must be a 10-pointer, another a 25-pointer.
Rule No. 7: You may not pick anyone who is famous for being almost dead (also known as the Schiavo Rule).
Rule No. 8: The final tally will be done at approximatley 12:30am, Jan. 1, 2007 by a man who once asked for directions in the lobby of a building of which WaterhouseCooper had been a tenant when they were still Coopers & Lybrand.
Rule No. 9: In the event of a tie, the winner will be the entrant with a selection judged to be morally dead. This will be decided by a comittee of those entrants no longer in the running.
Rule No. 10: There is no Rule No. 10. If you feel there should be, you will want to see someone about your unwholesome need for structure and authority; you may be bipolar.
