Kiite.
2008-07-21
2008-07-09
How Crazy People Try (but fail) To Buy A Condo
So the condo is both for sale and for rent at the moment. We only have 3 weeks to go before we leave and as such we've got to be open to whatever options we have. Yesterday we were informed that we had an offer to rent. The thing about a rental is that unless the guy wants to bargain you down on the price, there are no sign-backs and negotiation. It's a done-deal. We knew then that the condo would be handled by midnight.
But just to be assholes (and to see how serious they were) we sent a message to the crazy real estate agent from before (see the blog post below). The message was simply that we were getting an offer, and we'd accept it, so if your buyers are serious bring in a clean offer before our deadline or else we're done.
And so the saga continued. It's hard to describe exactly how much of a crazy, whiney, annoying shit this agent was. But you don't have love the guy, just his money. By way of background it is important to know a few things about this wack-job. He has never, ever been on time. He has never, ever respected a deadline (which are crucial to negotiations) and he has never, ever been honest.
So inside of that little context we sent our message. Of course he asked to meet our agent at 5pm. He was late, and didn't have an offer ready. Well, at least we knew he was operating consistently. He promised an offer, soon, any minute now. And an hour later it came. It was not 'clean' i.e. devoid of conditions, and it was not the amount we wanted. However, it was close, and the only condition was that he see a particular document that details the financial health of the condo corp. So we said fair enough, we'd go for it, but he had fucked up something that needed to be re-signed and the cheque for the deposit was not certified, and was drawn on a out of province bank. So we sent it back asking that to be fixed, and accepting conditional upon a certified cheque.
They came back late (i.e. AFTER the deadline) and now wanted it conditional upon financing, and wanted the buyer's trashy girlfriend to see it one more time. I won't give you the details of the conversations, but it got so far as our agent was yelling at the agent telling him he was a crook and storming out!
so at 8.45pm he finallly finished making out that offer, and handed it to us, initially asking us if we could have it back by 9pm. What an absolute dimwit and an asshole. We told him we'd let him know by midnight. At that point I think what i said was "Anthony, it's 8.45! we have not had our fucking dinner yet, so no, you can't have it back in 15 minutes, we need to think about it, go away and we'll call you!"
In the end we felt that they had inserted just enough conditions to allow them to back out later, when we'd lost our renter and were now minutes from going to HK, and (they hoped) desperate enough to take whatever shit they offered.
And, rather than play that silly shit, we just sent it back at 10pm and said that either they give us the proper offer with no conditions, or they could fuck off. Midnight came and went with no reply, so we faxed over our rental acceptance, and that was that.
- or was it? -
12.40, the agent emails our agent:
"Thank you,I will be taking my client to get a financial approval tomorrow. Once I have it, I'll give you a clean fresh offer without any conditions so we can wrap it up faster.
Except that our unit was no longer on the FUCKING MARKET because he had (as usual) let the goddam deadline sail right by.
This is by far the most bizarre experience ever. It's not merely a case of a bad agent, or a crooked agent, or a stupid agent. It's all those combined with unethical nasty buyers. Completely weird.
Well now it is over. Instead we have a nice guy renting our place for a year or more.
Now, anyone want our car?
2008-07-07
I can't possibly
I can't possibly, at this point, explain all that has gone on in the last while about the move to Hong Kong, but things are surely moving along. Eric got back from Hong Kong at the beginning of June, finished his 6 week secondment there. During that time he got his job sorted out and came to an agreement as to what he'd be doing there, and then the financial details that needed to be worked out.
They've essentially created a new job for him out in the HK office. He'll be regional sales and quality dude. That means that he'll be responsible for generating new business and keeping the printers in line. It's a good gig, similar to what he does here.
When I went to Hong Kong I wanted to find a job there, or at least make some progress towards that. I had applied to a few things, and called a few people and managed to make a few meetings happen while I was there.
I arrived in Hong Kong on the Wednesday night, and had 3 interviews set up for Friday. Of course as luck would have it, the warmest day of my entire trip was that Friday. Itw was easily 32 degrees and humid (I know this is nothing to the normal summer weather, and nothing to what we'll experience in August, but still it was hot). Of course I was also terribly jet lagged at that point, surviving on a Red Bull at 4pm, to make it to dinner time.
Long story short, I got called back for a second interview at one of the jobs, and at that interview was told I'd be offered a job. By the time I left I had the offer in hand. It was crazy how quickly it all moved. The job the offered was wicked cool. I will be working for a corporate English language training company the specialize in "In-house business English Training".
They wanted me to start right away-ish. We agreed on August as a start date. This caused its own set of problems. I returned to Toronto, and Eric followed a few weeks later and in 2 months we have to get our shit together and get moved out to Hong Kong. I am beginning to admire Hamish's life-philosophy of living as if you are on the run from the FBI - where everything you own could be put into one duffel-bag (assuming you're not using it to hide a body - not that he would, but why else is he on the run?).
So instead we're dragging crap to the Goodwill, selling stuff, primping, posing and selling our condo, buffing, cleaning and detailing our car and on and on .....
In the last few weeks we have reached a point of equilibrium. We have removed half stuff in our condo, so now it looks just empty enough to sell (you have to do this, people, when buying a condo or house, are incapable of all acts of imagination). We've sold stuff off, but nobody is allowed to pick it up until we sell the condo, because it has to look semi-empty, but not actually empty. So until we sell, it stays this way. There is nothing to do but wait. And stress out.
Our brains do what brains do when they have nothing useful, they eat themselves. So we've been fixated on what if we don't sell, or rent, or get rid of the car and a bunch of other options. It's horrible really. But something happened in the last week that kinda shifted.
We got a verbal offer on the condo. A slightly weird real estate agent came to us with an offer, well not really an offer, because of course if it is no signed and with a cheque, then it's not really an offer. But in any case he delivered us a verbal offer for the condo. It was really friggin' low, we would have worked with it, i.e. signed it back etc. if it had been on paper, but the guy then said that was his people's final offer. There's a whole blog entry to be written on what kind of a dick does that, but I'll save that for another time. Instead we told him to go away. He did. A week later we reduced our price on our listing. Still to nowhere within the range of what he offered but a significant reduction. Then he came back with an offer $1000 less than his original verbal offer. This time, as it was official, we dealt with it officially and signed it back, we came down a chunk (as you do to suggest you're wiling to work with a buyer) and sent it back. He came back a day later with an offer $1000 more - exactly what we had told him we would not sell for a week earlier, and clearly a stupid amount of money.
This asshole then had the nerve to be both surprised and a bit insulted when we refused to sign back the offer (that is to say, we let it die, and said we were no longer interested - a real estate 'fuck you'). But in all of this we realised that we didn't care, and we were not desperate, and that holding on to the condo for a month or two would not kill us. So in a way it was rather freeing.
So now we're still trying to sell or rent out the condo, and we may have a tenant this week, or sell it.... it's all up in the air. But in any case I'm a lot less stressed about it now than i was a few days ago.
As for what's next: well in the next few weeks we have to get rid of our furniture, finish up some work, say goodbye and head out. It's crazy, but we're winding up our Toronto lives for a while. The reality hit yesterday when we were putting together our going away party invite, Eric cried like a baby.
So that's the update for now.
2008-06-27
2008-06-24
Stuff For Sale
As you all know (or don't) Eric and I are moving to Hong Kong. So, we have to sell our stuff. Want to have a look?
2008-06-13
2008-05-29
2008-05-22
In answer to your questions.
1. I loved it. It's a great city, full of energy and vitality and pollution.
2. Yes the men are exactly as hot as I hoped/feared. And yes I will have to lose weight if I am ever to live there.
3. Yes. I got a job, no details yet, we're negotiating. I am, apparently, more valuable there, than here.
4. Yah, it does look like we're moving.
5. No, he's been travelling, so he has not been able to sort out his job arrangements yet.
6. August.
7. Yah, I took more pics, they'll be up Friday.
2008-05-15
HK pics
The connection is crap and my computer is worse, so please click here to see the first bunch of photos from HK.
2008-05-12
A collection of thoughts
I arrived on wednesday night - about 7pm and was met by Eric and his Auntie Jeanie at Kai Tak. The airport experience was exactly what you expect. Queues, people, a babel of voices, stern, uniformed men; every airport in every city. The first hint that I wasn't at home was the sub-machine gun toting cop. He was built like a brick shit-house as they say, and I think he knew it - the nicely tailored shirt suggested this guy knew what his assets were.
Once through I had a late dinner (breakfast or something) with Eric and Auntie Jeanie. Then into the city. They have a train to the city from the airport - how civilized. The trip is expensive by Hong Kong standards - more than $100HKD (that's about $15 Canadian). You pay it with a thing called an Octopus Card (no idea why the name - they don't even have a good logo, they should have Hamish design that, it'd be cute). This is a card you can 'charge' up with cash in 7-11 or at the MTR (the subway stations), and other places. Once you put cash on this thing you can use it for any transportation. (A word about that - the transport here is a mix of public and private. The MTR is the subway, the buses are a mix of companies, then there's the mini-buses, little 16 seat buses that boot around on routes all over the place, the prices are all over the place too, $9 to got Stanley, $3.70 to get from the MTR to our hotel.) But the Octopus can work on all of them you just touch the card (or your wallet) against a reader and deducts the price.
The system is really cool because you can use the money on the card to buy stuff in stores. It's very clever really, if they install it in bars that'd be wicked cool really. So yes in some ways the transport system here kicks Toronto's ass. However the city street design was laid out by a pigeon on opium in the 14th century, so finding your way around here is madness. It's completely 'wild west'.
***
Since I got here things have been pretty busy. I had one day by myself, then the next day i had two (well supposed to be 3) interviews. They went very well (both English schools, proving everyone who said I'd have an easy time of it, right). The third was a meeting with a placement agency here in HK. However jet lag kicked me in the ass and slept through it. I will call and grovel a bit today about that (yesterday was a bank holiday). So we walked a lot this weekend, hit the gay bars, and yesterday we went to the south side of the island, to a place called Stanley. Stanley (and Repulse Bay) is the resort-y end of things. It was truly beautiful. We sat on the patio of a bar and had a pint in the sun. It was very magical. Lots of expats, but still a nice place.
***
Impressions:
Hong Kong is a hill (mountain?), the island (and the other islands in the archipelago) are tall, steep green hills that pop up out of the South China Sea at improbable angles and elevations. Everything here is sheer and steep, with buildings perched on edges and faces of this place that would seem inhospitable were it not for the fact that there is no place else to build. There is no 'flat', so your apartment could be twenty stories tall (or 50 for that matter) and yet be half as tall as the one behind it; one block over and the elevation has increased 50 feet.
The buildings here are all impossibly thin too. Often no more than two or three apartments per floor. Someone told me that's because there are limitations to the size (footprint) of the buildings so that they present a slimmer profile to the considerable winds that blow up and down the mountain especially during monsoon season. The result are spires that rise into the sky. Added to the fact that they're perched on the edge of mountain elevations, and you've got one spectacular skyline. It's famous for good reason.
It's loud here. From the cackling sounds of the tropical birds that screech in the morning, to the trams, buses and, of course, people, talking on their mobile phones, the place is fucking loud. You can use your cell phone EVERYWHERE here, there are no black-holes. In Toronto every basement and elevator is a black-out zone. In HK you can use your phone on the subway. Sounds convenient eh? Mostly it's just annoying.
***
Things I like about HK
• Beer is about $1.25 at 7-11
• Tax rate is only 15%
• The, um, 'scenery'
• The MTR (Subway)
• The Octopus Card
• No last call
• Taxis are CHEAP (ten minute ride, $40HKD or about $5CDN)
Things I don't like about HK
• Smoking is still allowed in some bars
• The transport system is confusing (outside of the MTR)
• Getting directions
• Pedestrians do not have the right of way
This is a short list, i'm still compiling.
Anyway this is a long rambling kind of post, but i'll do more later and in more sensible order. This is really just a download of all the thoughts in my head.
It's now Wednesday morning, I have lunch at 12.30 with someone I met on the plane (a Chinese-American Expat who runs a website for kids, she's invited me to a swank place in Central). Then i'm off to another interview for a job. I'll blog about that later tonight depending on how it goes.
'til then... ttyl.
2008-05-11
Some quick pics of Hong Kong
Perhaps at some point this was a "De Luxe Hotel" but it has slipped a bit.
Near the Times Square Mall. People shop until really late at night here. Stores are open from noon to midnight.
The view from my hotel window.
It's the architecture, really.
Me.
Him.
2008-05-09
reveng for sweet and sour chicken balls
I will blog more on my early impressions of HK soon. The short version is: hot, crowded, beautiful, tropical, noisy, fun, huge.
But one thing I do want to say is that these people are getting their revenge for North American Chinese Food. What they've done to breakfast is criminal, and right now I am eating a spaghetti concoction that is very very weird. The ingredients are pretty much right, but sum is not quite what you'd expect from the parts.
I'll take pictures (when in Asia right?). And post back here tonight after my meetings.
2008-05-07
I made it
I"m sitting in the hotel thingy with Eric in Pau Ma Tei in Hong Kong. Yes it was a journey of planes, trains and automobiles. I've been on the go now since 7am Toronto time Tuesday, and it's now 11am Toronto time the next day. The good thing about the bad food and the crap movies, and the screaming baby on the flight is that I'm a bit tired. so I don't think I'll have much trouble sleeping tonight.
I'll blog more later, but rest assured I'm here safe.
*mwah!*
2008-05-06
Song Titles Explain My Life
"You get up every morning
From your alarm clock's warning"
"woke up, got out of bed, dragged a comb across my head"
"Big ol' jet airliner.."
"I'm leaving on a jet plane"
Yup, I am leaving in a few mins for the airport. I'll blog when I get to Hong Kong!!!
2008-05-02
Blogger-Block
I have not blogged in ages. I can tell that you're starting to get bored coming back here for no update because weekly I get a report of traffic and it's been pretty dismal these last months. I don't blame you really. I want to promise to be more boggeriffic in future but there's no way i can promise that right now. I can however give you an update on what's going on lately. As much as I feel like I have repeated this a million times, I realise there are many who I haven't spoken to.
Where to start?
1. Yes we are still considering moving to Hong Kong. "HUH??" you say. "But I thought you WERE moving!" Well yes it is our intention to move, certainly. But this is not as binary (going/not going) as some may like it to be. We came up with this bright idea nearly 6 months ago and we've been working it since then. Surprisingly (or not) it is not simple. There are about 347 things to think about before you even get to the fundamentally important question of whether you want to go. So first we had to find out if we could bring the dog (yes, but he will hate us and be jetlagged for months we've been told), get a visa (yes again, but I may have to be an ESL teacher as that is all that whitey is good for over there... well a few other things perhaps but this is a family blog so let's demure), and on it goes. So having gotten many of the questions answered in terms of CAN we, now we're at the point of figuring out do we want to.
2. Eric is in Hong Kong on a 6-week assignment for his work. The premise of this entire adventure is to live/work there, and the impetus for the current timing is that his company is willing to transfer him. So he arranged a 6 week secondment to their HK office that started this week. He flew over on Saturday morning, hung over and a bit sad (thanks to all who turned out to see him off at woody's Friday.) Eric's work thing has turned out a bit differently than we'd originally intended, but in the interests of diplomacy I'll say no more. What is cool is that he's there for a long enough time to really know if he wants to live there. And they have given him a nice apartment in Happy Valley.
3. I'm going for two weeks. On Tuesday (coming up) I'll fly to Hong Kong for my own reconnaissance trip. I've already got 4 job interviews set up already and hope to get a few more while I'm there.
4. Timing. Well that's the hard part right now. So far we've only gotten as far as planning the current trips. Go to Hong Kong and check it out. IF we like it and IF we can get jobs there (or at least thing we can) and IF it does not seem like a totally daft thing to do, THEN we'll make a firm plan on when/how we go. Because let's face it, if I get a job 5 minutes after landing and they want me to start a few weeks later, well that's a different ball of hair than if I don't at all. So in answer to your question "when are you moving?" we have not effing idea.
This week has been taken up with finishing up as much work as I could so that my clients don't notice my absence (although one of them - a college I write for - is going to have me do some profiles of grads of theirs in Hong Kong, so the trip's now officially a write-off!). And tomorrow is laundry day. Although I am tempted to take my friends' advice and just show up and buy everything. However, I have seen underpants that are made in China, and they tend to be daft, unattractive on any but the most well built, concoctions of string and netting. And besides I'm quite sure that I would be a triple XXL in Hong Kong terms and frankly my ego can't bear the thought of shopping in the "big'n'tall" section. So Saturday I will launder and prepare to pack, do some banking and such like.
As for blog-block? well I may blog while I am over there. I'll try to be good about it and post some pics and stuff, but we'll have to see how much time I have and how much energy i have for it.
Have a good couple of weeks and I'll catch up with you all when I'm back. IF on the off chance I do blog, please post comments so i'll know you're reading (and this includes you PJ and Damien, even if you post bloody anonymously!!!)
2008-04-07
2008-03-30
Boy Band to Bear
Thanks to James Anok, my oldest (ahem) chum (we met on day one of grade 9 and hated each other) He's apparently scanning old pics and posting them on his FaceBook. Hame forwarded me this pic of me at Pride in 1993. I saw this, my hair (oh my beautiful, if rather poofy hair), and I thought. Oh god I've become a bear (i haven't shaved in a week).
Dear lord look at this boy, do you think he knew then that he'd be a bear today?!?!?!
sheesh, i need a drink.
2008-03-19
I never saved for retirement
In light of an ever-moving deadline for moving, I'm reinstating Kiite for now. I'll probably kill it when i search in earnest for a job in HK. But for now its back.
2008-02-11
Retirement
Yah so i've thought more about it, and I will be removing this blog Friday of this week. i'll reconstruct it as something else but given that i'm going into job hunt mode, I do not want to be googled and have a prospective employer read this shite.
I have not decided all the details yet but I will probably have a resume up here, and a blog perhaps, but only about the move to HK.
so get your fill this week boys and girls.... it's gone come saturday morning.
2008-01-31
I'm in love with Harlan Ellison
I have no idea who this guy is, but I love him. In case you're wondering why the writer's strike is on in the US, this is it.
2008-01-30
"...I'm so glad we had this time together..."
Is it time to retire our blogs? Has the moment passed? Will we look back in 10 years on the couple or three years we journaled online and attempted to fashion ourselves writers with the sahttp://www.blogger.com/img/gl.link.gifme fondness we now reserve for parachute pants?
I think something is definitely changing. Eric, who was never prolific, now writes about 6 times a year. Joe's love may be invisible or not, according to his most recent post, but his blog sure is. Even Shigeki, who is now working at a less busy job, blogs less. Bert's blog has shuddered to a shuttered halt. Now he's the most prolific professional writer I know so I guess we can forgive him for not wanting to give it away for free, but now we all feel like a whore's husband. Hamish is about the only one who writes regularly, but even he has slowed down some. And Heipel is now a photo blogger. Which is nice and all as he takes lovely pictures, but he insists on adding copy to them. Its his prerogative I suppose, but really who the fuck cares about shutter speed - it's a pretty picture, let it stand.
And then there's me. There are many reasons I don't blog. Well, actually there are not. I'm just lazy. And now we're about to move to Hong Kong (by 'about to' I mean sometime in the next 8 months) and I'm going to be looking for a job over there. I wonder now whether I should remove the blog until at least I get a job? For the moment I'll leave it up, and contribute occasionally, but who knows what the future holds.